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January 2024 Thoughts

January 1

18:12

Some people started to spam my guestbox so I implemented a captcha. I hope that's enough for it to stop, I don't want to play cat and mouse. If it isn't enough then I'll just remove the guestbox.

This is why we can't have nice things.

19:51

We just played some lethal company with a friend and they asked me "hey tomimi, how do you play against the decrepid zombie witch?". And I was like wha.

January 2

11:30

We played bingo on new years and I decided to put like $1500 CLP (around $1.5 USD) for the prize. And my youngest cousin (like 8 years old) said, "ok, but next time do a real prize, like a Playstation 5!". This child has no idea how much money things cost. To be fair I didn't know at that age either.

12:50

Its so stressful being unemployed at the beginning of the month. I just have to watch as 62% of my monthly cost of living go to rent, health insurance and retirement money. It also feels like being on a timer before the money runs out and I would have to go back to living with my parents and I do NOT want to do that. My mental health would suffer so much, I don't know how I would manage it.

If I don't find work by march I think I'll have to start applying to junior positions. BUT THEN AGAIN that would still be difficult because I'm overqualified for that and bussineses don't want that because overqualified people go away when they get a better offer. Which of course they do, you ARE underpaying them after all. Ogh, job hunting is so miserable.

January 3

15:07

I'm doing some stuff to get the spanish nacionality because my mum said it was a good idea. The thing is that its becoming such a drag, I've sent an email twice and both time an email comes back saying "hey the email you sent was too heavy, its 5MB and we only accept 4MB or lower". THE FILES IN THE EMAIL ARE JUST 2.9 MB I SWEAR TO GOD WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.

I was willing to do this if it was easy, but now that its getting annoying I just feel I'm doing this thing I don't care about because my mother wants me to. This sucks, I'm so mad.

15:13

There, I sent it again. If they reject it one more time I'm gonna bite something.

15:17

Alright, it worked. Apparently they'll send me credentials around one or two months for now. So yeah, I don't have to do anything in that time.

Still, it kinda sucks. I've been feeling super unmotivated lately, and having two days where I've had to back to back do a lot of management really exhausts me. I just want to sit down and have my little plan and do my little things and not have it broken to pieces by random people asking me to do stuff the same day.

I just don't want to do anything now, I'm tired and frustrated. I think I'll write on my personal diary for a little while.

January 5

11:45

I'm hungy

January 7

10:13

Pretty sure youtube did a whoopsie and made all the text italics for a brief period of time an hour ago. I have a screenshot, but I wouldn't believe it if I saw it and didn't know it was me who took it. Its really easy to fabricate screenshots like these.

January 9

17:00

Have to try and keep creating to share some progress with my friends. If I do so maybe they'll feel inspired to also create stuff, just like I am when they share their progress with me.

January 11

22:22

Feeling a little overwhelmed right now. But today I discovered that little doodles I draw that make me happy can also make other people happy. I sent a shinx-shaped cookie to a really cool artist I follow called nyaloha on tumblr and their response was so sweet.

I almost cried, its insane to me that something I made can make someone feel like that. I should do things like that more often, asks are one of the most fun features of tumblr.

January 12

15:26

One of the wonders of having a spare notebook with linux is that I have the best of that operating system too. I just learned how to repair some pendrives I lend to a friend a while back. They weren't broken, they just had a lot of partitions, and turns out editing partitions in ubuntu is super easy.

I also discovered a new technique for typing fast. Every time I make a mistake I slow down, and I start building up speed until I make another mistake. It feels like I'm going a lot slower than before but turns out going slow and making a couple of mistakes is a lot faster than rushing and making a lot of mistakes.

16:05

Just read a post on tumblr about toby fox's tweet in regards to matpat leaving youtube. And the post was just kinda bait? and some friends that I respect reblogged it? They probably just did that because tumblr scroll head empty and stuff though.

The post itself made the situation look like if matpat's youtube career just died and toby fox was making fun of it. And it really isn't true, how I understand it, toby fox's tweet is that it's just a joke alluding to when matpat made the sans is ness theory. There's literally no drama involved in the interaction, I feel like its all in people's heads.

The post's last reblog included a screenshot of "toby fox calling matpat on his bullshit" but that interaction had nothing to do with anything. Like that screenshot was from when game theory streamed playing heartbound and toby fox was calling matpat on refering to the game as "undertale-like" and not having a link to the game in the description. And that was wrong on matpat's part, but the situation was remembered as "tobyfox and matpat drama" and nobody remembers heartbound. And the tumblr post didn't specified any of this so it seems like it refers to matpat never uploading undertale/deltarune videos which is true but we don't know if it had something to do with that???

I don't know, it sucks because first: heartbound is not mentioned in the tumblr post. Second, there is no drama between toby fox and matpat, matpat only made a mistake. And third, this stuff is being shared in tumblr like crazy.

I'm disappointed in tumblr users, they are "raising awareness" all the time, but just share things mindlessly without any thought or research. To be fair social media's format is kinda responsible of this, how are people gonna put any thought into reseraching a post if they are exhausted from processing 100 posts before that.

Well anyways I better get back to studying, see ya!

January 16

14:46

The day before yesterday some of my friends were playing ff14 and I decided to draw stuff while I watched them play. It was super fun, here are some doodles.

11:20

I was with a friend group on discord and friend talked over me 3 times today and when I asked if they wanted to see what I have been working on lately they said a flat "no". I'm kind of mad about it, they didn't say anything else, I just interpret it as "sorry, not interested".

For a while now I've been feeling unconfortable when they are in the call. They are pretty hard in their relationships, teasing their friends a lot, insulting them as a joke and stuff. I don't like those things though, I guess I'll start avoiding that friend group when they are in the call. Today I felt genuinely pissed, and I chose to leave and take care of myself, I don't want to feel like that again.

Anyways spoilers for Va11 Hall-A Chapter 2

I'm midway through the chapter and it destroyed me. I was ready to chill and recover myself a bit and the scene with the ex's sister hit me like a truck. I'm team Jill all the way, she did nothing wrong, and it's never too late to apologize. Sometimes life just takes people away before you can reconnect with them though... I can relate to that.

January 17

22:11

Got to chapter 3 in VA11 Hall-A finally! Read through the acheivements and there seems to be a good and bad ending. I always want to get the good ending, but I don't know if I want to play the whole game again. Why am I like this?

January 29

20:23

I think I'll start buying fruit instead of juice. I used to buy juice because it was a great way to get some sugar into my system while simultaneously hydrating myself. But nowadays all the juice bottles in my local supermarket are "low sugar" and I can't use it for that anymore.

If I wanted water with a funky flavor I would have bought soda. But I don't want to buy soda because it makes my tummy weird and my mouth burpy.

January 31

12:40

Its been a while I don't update this website, I think I'll work on it for a little while.

22:44

Why are my friends so funny I love them.

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